Archive for the ‘Television’ category

Through Her Eyes

March 15, 2018

This is becoming the easy new thing to fixate upon, but…

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Either Abigail, who does not normally need corrective lenses, drove from the hospital to the mansion wearing the prescription glasses of a middle-aged woman, or Abigail has been driving around Salem sans much-needed corrective lenses every time but this one. Neither option is really what I’d call good, you know? (I’m voiding the possibility that “Dr. Laura” removed the glasses whilst driving, considering the “Gabby” alter’s flip-out about losing her wig. These alters are real attached to their props.)

I’ll reluctantly admit that, for a second or two, I kind of got the whole weird, twisted “lovers against the world” thing they seem to be trying to sell with Stefan and Gabigail. I’m still unclear on what has made him fall for Abigail or her wig-sporting alter this quickly, and if he sleeps with her while she’s anyone but her actual self and unable to give consent, he’s a rapist, so… they will probably go there and spend the next 8-10 years trying to walk it back, because that’s how things go around here.

Meanwhile, Valerie is somehow the one who wound up in a straitjacket.

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That… does not look comfortable, does it? Though she might need the restraints if she and Lani keep meeting up to spar at that one table in the Pub that they seem to have permanently reserved for these conversations. I like seeing some fire out of Val, and I like how heavily the whole backstory involving Eli is playing into this — also in Julie’s unknowing comments to Eli himself — but I cannot imagine listening to like six more months of this.


Two Short-Term Returns Confirmed

March 14, 2018

I can promise that you won’t guess at least one of these…


Reboot Recap: After — Sept. 23, 2011

March 14, 2018

In accordance with the threat promise I made last week about reviewing some of the 2011 eps being rerun on Bravo, let’s jump into the episode that first aired on Monday, September 23, 2011. This was the official start of the “MarDar” reboot and, as we’ll soon discover, a harbinger of some… notable things to come. Again, please pardon these cell phone photos I took of my TV screen, since there’s no good way to screenshot these online.

We start off in the foyer of the Horton house, where Hope is putting on her earrings in the mirror even though she does not live there. She gazes out the window at the lovely weather they’ll have for tonight’s big party. When the doorbell rings, Jennifer rushes in to answer it, and the world lets out a groan when they see Daniel standing there. But Julie and Doug are right behind him! They all grill Hope about what big surprises are in store, and in the first of roughly 14,000 mentions to come, she admits that she’s invited some special guests who meant a lot to Tom and Alice.

In a generic room that could be a bedroom in any of the mansions or the Martin House but is currently representing the Salem Inn, a bearded Jack Deveraux fixes his tie and gazes at a recent, printed-out photo of Jennifer and Kate Mansi’s Abigail which, if he’s actually been a captive, it makes no sense for him to have in his possession. Was Jen just mailing shit to al Qaeda headquarters hoping it might find him?

Back at the house, Jen realizes that Doug and Julie know about the secret and gets all uppity, but no one’s cracking. As they all head out, we pan to a tied bundle of notes on the floor, which apparently no one has noticed for at least a full day, since they fell at the end of an episode from the prior week that I just watched.


Now we go to the Kiriakis mansion, where Justin and Adrienne are all dressed up for the party and waiting with the younger crew of Sonny, Will, Gabi, Abigail, Chad, and Melanie. I had forgotten how… Jersey this incarnation of Abigail originally came off. Sonny also looks a lot younger and slimmer than in the present-day episodes, like jarringly so. Adrienne doesn’t remember there ever being a party in the Town Square, which is accurate since it wasn’t actually a place until like four episodes ago. Victor comes in wearing a tux. Gabi randomly asks Melanie if she’s ever ridden in a limo as a segue into asking if she’s doing okay since Dario left. Don’t worry, he’ll be back in four-and-a-half years having aged an entire decade! Maggie comes in, dressed up, and Victor says she takes his breath away. He’s worried about her health since her MG flare-up, but she insists she’s good to go. They head out to the limos. Mel stays behind for a second, a bit sad, before joining them. I had forgotten how abruptly they just tossed her into this age bracket during this writer switch, but I really liked it. She felt so much more natural hanging out with Sonny and Abigail than she did with Philip and Brady and Arianna 1.0.



Cover It Up

March 13, 2018

How nice that Adrienne is back from her trip to Teal Island, even though she still seems to be dressing according to their government rule that everything has to be the same color.

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Seriously: earrings, coat, and sweater all the same color? Try and mix it up a little, sis. I am, however, glad to see this haircut — I love the shorter hair on Judi Evans — as well as the fact that both Adrienne and Kayla actually bothered to wear coats during the winter. If you can put aside the facts that the Town Square is supposed to be indoors and that Claire was simultaneously having an outdoor photo shoot dressed like she was attending a Fourth of July picnic, it’s real progress.

It’s generally lovely to see Adrienne again, especially after months away. I’m guessing that they used Judi Evans (who isn’t even on-contract) as much as the budget would allow during the Bonnie story, so they were forced to rest her for a while, but it’s been a little awkward to have her completely and totally absent. At least she’s back to support her brother as he fights off blindness and makes excuses for the person who poisoned him.

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I get that John had his reasons, but boy, was it satisfying to see Kayla lash out at him a little. You’d think super-spy John might have at least tried to go to Steve and tell him what Pamela was up to, so that Steve could’ve played along while they figured out how to outsmart her or something. Or anything! Why is everyone else acting like everything John did was totally normal and not worth another thought?

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The next time someone I’m allegedly related to shoots me with a tranquilizer and locks me in a mausoleum — but doesn’t actually shoot me, what a saint! — my follow-up step will be to ask him to babysit my child while I sit at home doing nothing until the object of my lust arrives to have a beer. Solid life advice.

There was definite chemistry on display during that Will/Paul kiss and subsequent shirt-ripping-off. Stupid Sonny, interrupting. All his barking and scolding has really gotten old. Although he’s quite correct to be pissed at Victor for playing him and Brady against one another. I still don’t understand why all these people are so hungry to be CEO of Titan specifically. It’s unstable, everyone who works there is unstable, and there’s always a coup around the corner. You’ve already been the acting CEO of a multinational conglomerate — go get a job at Amazon or Google and enjoy the perks! (Perks include: having an office.)

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I’m really torn over how to feel regarding this Brady/Eve wedding debacle. On one hand, they’re both idiots for ever expecting this to go well. On the other, it made for a nice acting showcase for both performers. And on a third, mutant hand grown in Dr. Rolf’s laboratory, Maggie and Victor are total assholes for the way they handled this. I expect Victor to brush off something like his grandson being devastated with a statement like, “I left you a message!” — but why is this where Maggie draws the line? “Sure, hurt your grandson, but do not let Eve Donovan be duped out of a company she doesn’t deserve!” I actually did like her standing up to Victor, especially when she talked about how Eve lost a daughter and has been through enough, but this whole business of Brady being an afterthought feels off. At least she finally caught him drinking! She might get back in my good graces solely by sparing us from any further scenes of Brady standing at that bar in the living room, contemplating the liquor that Victor keeps stocked at all hours despite both his wife and grandson being addicts.


Living Her Truth

March 10, 2018

I’m starting to think that Abigail’s psyche fractured mostly out of a desire to accessorize.

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Convenient that Stefan had reading glasses sitting there when her “Laura” persona took over! Are you even an alter if you don’t have the appropriate props? I’m a little concerned that she either didn’t notice that she was wearing a prescription she doesn’t need or that Stefan has fake glasses that he wears when alone. Not sure which is weirder. But between the glasses and the black wig, maybe all Abigail needs for “treatment” is a trip to Claire’s. Get this broad some bangles and let’s see if that helps!

I’m also thoroughly confused about the timeline of her alters emerging. If Abigail did kill Andre and then developed DID as a result of not being able to handle what she’d done, what the hell was she doing marching into that office already dressed up as “Gabby”? Or is this one of those things I’m just not supposed to think about, like how Sami allegedly sold an infant Belle on the black market even though they now appear to be the same age?

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While we’re on the subject of women who are always ready with just the right get-up, Eve apparently keeps a wedding dress in her room just in case. I guess that does sort of fit with those whole serial-black-widow thing they’ve been peddling since her return… Anyway, I was genuinely surprised by her calling Brady out at the very end. Only in Salem would be it shocking that a woman decided not to impulsively marry her sister’s ex with whom she’s been sleeping and sniping for mere months, but that’s just the kind of world this is.


NBC Renews Days for Another Year

March 8, 2018

Welp, it’s official: Days of Our Lives will remain on the air through at least September 2019. Deadline Hollywood reports that NBC has officially renewed the show for its 54 season.


Considering that ratings have been on the rise, they just started the Bravo reruns, and Megyn Kelly has left Today on the verge of disaster, this isn’t a huge surprise, but it’s reassuring to know that it’s for real. Here’s to many more years of Grandma Alice’s donuts, police incompetence, and evil plots that make no logical or financial sense!


Reboot Recap: Before — Sept. 18, 2011

March 7, 2018

Since Bravo is now airing classic episodes, starting with the fall of 2011, and I have some kind of death wish, I haven’t been able to resist checking out the older episodes and see how they stack up against current Days… and how they compare to my memories of this period. There’s no way in hell I’m going to be able to keep up with the two episodes a day Bravo is airing (they start at 6 a.m., BTW), but I fully intend to record one or two a week and check in as they go along. But they picked an interesting time to pick up, because the first week of episodes are the set-up for the big “MarDar” reboot, which featured the debut of the Horton Town Square and the returns of several characters. I thought it’d be fun to take a look at one of the episodes from right before this reboot, and I’ll follow it up soon with a recap of one of the official relaunch installments. So hop in Eugene Bradford’s time machine and travel back to September 18, 2011 with me, and please excuse the “screenshots” that are actually just iPhone photos I took of my TV…

We open with Sami and Rafe in their apartment, which based upon the front door and kitchen was definitely repurposed into the college kids’ loft of today.


They talk about how Quinn Hudson was arrested for beating up prostitutes (I believe we called that criminal “the Prostitute Pummeler” around these parts, thank you very much!).

In the Salem PD’s interrogation room — same set as the present-day — Bo and Hope are questioning Quinn, the Australian pimp who showed up in Salem and was revealed to be a son whom Vivian Alamain had for some reason never mentioned. He swears that he is innocent. He’s really a good-looking guy, and not an entirely terrible actor. Too bad he was saddled with such a ridiculous backstory.

Outside the Brady Pub, Vivian comes bustling up to meet with Gus, a.k.a. Replacement Ivan. This character was so absolutely random. Vivian is in a tizzy. Her son needs help! Maybe someone should show her a copy of this episode so that she remembers that Quinn, not Stefan, was once her focus — or at least mentions him. Does Stefan even know that he has a brother on that side?

When they hurry off to the police station, Nicole comes through, sporting long and not-hideous hair. When did her fashion go so terribly wrong? When she started working in the rectory? Anyway, she quickly finds EJ and says that she needs his help. EJ: “Why? What have you done?” Ha! But no, it’s Taylor who actually needs him. Even hearing that name has caused my blood pressure to spike.

In a hospital room (you know the one), Brady sits at the bedside of a comatose Chloe. A photo of an infant who is allegedly Parker rests nearby, and some music that I think is supposed to be opera plays. It actually sounds like if you mixed opera with that moaning porn music they used to use for Eve, if you can imagine such a thing. Chloe begins to wake up and mutters Brady’s name…

Cue the familiar opening titles.

When we return, Sami is telling Rafe, whose hair suggests that he is headed out to a Big Time Rush audition, about her job hunt.