Archive for the ‘Real Housewives of Beverly Hills’ category

I’m Not a Bitch, But I’ve Played One on TV!

February 13, 2015

I keep meaning to do some kind of post about The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, a popular documentary about a bunch of harpies who shriek at one another over who did and did not show up to someone’s dinner/White Party/book signing/shoe launch/etc., because two familiar Salem faces are among the cast this season: Eileen Davidson (Kristen/Susan) and Lisa Rinna (Billie). Unfortunately, I also find this show exhausting to watch — and that’s saying something, coming from a person deranged enough to voluntarily commit to blogging about Days! — so once it’s over and I’ve read the week’s Vulture recap (these are brilliant and about 80% of the reason I even watch the show), I try to scrub my brain clean until the next Tuesday hits. Point being, I haven’t gotten around to doing it yet.

But this video, aired on Watch What Happens Live, gives me a reason to do so, as it’s directly related to Days:

Yes, that is Andy Cohen playing Theresa Donovan against Davidson’s Kristen in an actual scene from the show. Go on. If you’ve never appreciated Jen Lilley (Theresa) before, you will after this horrorshow. Also worthwhile for the moment when Davidson goes off-script and calls Theresa “you piece of trash bitch,” which is probably an actual quote from a Real Housewife, come to think of it.

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We Need to Talk About Billie

July 9, 2014

Remember when the most insane thing Lisa Rinna had done was endorse Depends?

lisa-rinna-hair

Well, perhaps you’ll change your mind after watching this video of her performing “Hot ‘N’ Cold” while dressed as Katy Perry.

This is from a show called Sing Your Face Off, in which D-list celebs dress up as pop stars and sing their hits. This was apparently an actual program that aired on planet Earth, and I don’t know how I missed it. If you’re not fully shocked yet, you might care to check out Lisa performing as Britney Spears in full schoolgirl regalia and/or Lisa dressed up as Canadian menace Justin Bieber singing “Baby.” I really can’t stop being shocked by all of this. There are others, if you dare to explore the YouTube links. Also, any show that has Carnie Wilson, RuPaul, and Richard Simmons as its judging panel cannot be a real thing… right?

She’s also apparently hosted/hosting something called A Séance with Lisa Rinna — which looks to be as batshit as it sounds — on LMN, which I think is the Lifetime Movie Network, and that just makes me angry that they’re showing weird reality programming about séances instead of Mother, May I Sleep With Danger? on an endless loop.

And now comes word that she has likely signed on to join the next season of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. I guess that sort of makes me sad, in the sense that she actually became famous for acting and not just behaving like a drunken banshee… but on the other hand, this woman has literally figured out a way to make a living out of nonsense, and I have to admire that.