Does Salem Have a Weavologist?

Who’s the winner for Best Wig at the bicentennial gala? Your contestants are as follows:

Adrienne, who wanted to make sure she’d look like her date’s mother…

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The dynamic duo of Kate Roberts and Nicole Walker Kate Gosselin…

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and Theresa, who looks like she’s going to topple under the weight of that thing at any moment.

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Just kidding! They all look absolutely ridiculous.

The 60s theme for the gala is a fun nod to the decade of the show’s origin, but boy, were some of those wigs a bad idea. Dishonorable mention goes to Hope, who was described on another board as looking like Susan Banks, and now I can’t un-see that. That said, most of the men look great — Brady up there in particular, and also Daniel, who cleans up so well! — and quite a few other women look lovely. Check out Marlena, Eve, and Jennifer, for example:

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I can’t be the only one who wondered if they were going for some kind of Jennifer/Roman chemistry test, right? I’m actually not hating Roman’s expanded role of late, but the thought of sticking Melissa Reeves with Ol’ Dentures McGee does not sit well with me. I wouldn’t mind seeing Roman in a C-level relationship with Maxine or Laura Horton or something, but do we really need to relegate Jennifer to that?

I’ve had plenty to say about the stupidity of turning Hope/Aiden into a lesser version of Abigail/Ben, but I have to say that I’m enjoying the melodramatic tension of this gala — even if I don’t understand why Hope would plan to have her wedding after a damn party. Everyone’s going to be hammered by the time the reception rolls around! And who the hell wants to get dressed for a theme party before getting dressed for her own wedding? I’m also still struggling with the false equivalency of Bo racing to stop this wedding. He doesn’t know that Aiden is planning to kill Hope. Caroline doesn’t know that. Hope chose to move on with another man. I know Bo still loves her, but what does he think he’s “rescuing” her from? Not that I didn’t squeal with glee at him and Steve taking off on the motorcycle, or at Caroline shouting at them to stop the wedding, but there’s a logical component that doesn’t add up here. Nevertheless, Monday and Tuesday’s episodes felt super-soapy — this has the air of a real, fancy soap gala, with everyone dressed up and swirling around and intersecting, and I love that, so I’m just trying to go with the idiotic story elements. Throwing in a bunch of toasts to Tom and Alice to make me tear up helped, too.

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25 Comments on “Does Salem Have a Weavologist?”

  1. Robbiemac Says:

    Yep to everything you said. And…are there sparks between JJ and Gabi? Huh? Getting together to squelch their grief is a really bad idea! Also, why didn’t any of the guys wear Beatle-bob wigs or Stones’ leggings? Seems they just dressed for the wedding! I haven’t watched today….thanks for not divulging too much!

    • mykleraus Says:

      I like the idea of JJ and Gabi, but they sure are humdrum so far. It sort of seems like they already know they’re each other’s love interests and are just going through the paces.

  2. underyourwing Says:

    my vote for most vomit inducing wig goes to Adrienne….jesus. now, the cleavage, i could get into that…..but the wig? OY. Theresa’s looked like something from Beach Blanket Babylon in San Fransisco….. I muted all the sappy speeches because apathy…….

    Since things did not go well with Abe & Maxine I think Roman should date her…….someone, anyone please –get into Maxine’s pants.

    The drama with Ben & “Abs” was worth the whole show……..I just wonder how many daze they are gonna draw all this out??

  3. underyourwing Says:

    I am also past beyond Victor and his verbal diarrhea harassment of Theresa and any of Brady’s so called girlfriends. He was so disgusting and vicious today I wanted to gut punch him then knee him in the chin hard. Srsly, he was repellent, repulsive & odious.
    How Maggie could be with this POS is beyond me…..he hates women!

    • mykleraus Says:

      I generally would agree, except that Theresa and Nicole kind of deserve it. Especially Nicole, given that she had him murdered. I recall him being okay with Brady’s relationships with Arianna and Madison, at least (dull as they both were).

  4. rustyspigot Says:

    I haven’t seen the episodes yet, but I think the wigs are fun. Especially to counteract the damn murders.

    • mykleraus Says:

      The whole aesthetic is fun. The wigs are just, like, cranked up to an 11 when a 7 would have sufficed. But at least it’s something to poke fun at without it being show-ruining or anything!

  5. Days fan Says:

    I love the wigs – except for hope’s. She looked like Eunice Higgins from mama’s family. Other than that (and Victor) I love everything so far !

  6. ADW Says:

    LMAO on the Susan Banks wig. 😄 I think the way Victor abhors Theresa is not just bc of what she did to Daniel, John, and Brady, I’m convinced it has a lot to do with all that complicated history Victor had with her parents.
    All the guys with exception of Chase looked dashing in their tuxes and suits although they didn’t really look retro ’60s. I can’t stand Chase’s hideous hair cut and he looked like a cross between a leprechaun and a sportscaster back in the day.
    Remember those black velvet clip up drape things girls wore for school portraits? Adrienne and Marlena’s outfits look like an extension of that. Although Marlena looked gorgeous as usual and Adrienne looked like she gained 50 lbs and 20 years over night.
    Theresa’s dress she designed was rather disappointing (after I loved practically everything else she’s worn so far). That poor dress started to commit suicide but, nonetheless the wardrobe malfunction was hysterical. Nicole’s gown was hideous like a bad trip; I swear those gaudy gold design looked like floating embroyos and fetuses under a microscope. Theresa, Nicole, and Kate are the main source comic relief.
    Among my favorites, Lani looked very cute in and vivacious in that water color dress like a character in Hair Spray. I look forward to Lani becoming a detective bc that cop uniform does her body no justice. Eve looked stunning in and statuesque like a goddess in the black and white gown.
    Abigail’s hair actually looked healthy and shiny (not oily, limp, and damaged) for the first time in several months. My bad, I think that was a wig too.
    Some of the outfits and wigs were hideous but, I was impressed with the make up department they nailed it with the dramatic cat eyes and red lips. I guess they finally brought someone on who doesn’t want to take a dump Jennifer’s face and hair.
    It seems there might be an impending pairing between JJ/Gabi and Rafe/Lani. Rafe seems reluctant to s— where he eats but, I think he’s smitten and vice versa. Really JJ? First Paige, then her Mom, and now her sister! 😄

    • mykleraus Says:

      OMG, Chase was totally doing the 60s sportscaster look. Ha! And you’re so right about Marlena and Adrienne’s black drapes. Abigail’s hair really did look good — and it better, because we’re probably going to see it look like that for the next 8 weeks.

      I hadn’t thought about that angle of JJ/Gabi. Don’t forget he got really close (not as close as Daniel/Kristen — ew) with Theresa, too. Kimberly Brady had better watch out!

    • Cyn Says:

      On the first day of the gala, the makeup was harsh and hideous, especially on some of our older favorites like Hope – it was as if the makeup people decided that they hated her! She looked better for the wedding, at least. Poor Kayla was not so lucky.

      • mykleraus Says:

        Hope’s first hairdo/wig got more insane between Monday and Tuesday’s episodes, too. The flip on the sides was, like, comically exaggerated before she left to go home and change for her wedding.

  7. Cyn Says:

    Logic has never been DAYS strong suit. In fact, did any one ever see Abs bother to tell the police that Will had been waiting in her apartment the day he was killed? I’m sure it just slipped her mind!

    • mykleraus Says:

      That drove me nuts. You’d think it would’ve at least warranted a mention!

    • Shea Says:

      Pregnancy brain?

      i thought she had mentioned it and Ben said no one was there when he got home but maybe that that was the two of them talking and not the police. The timing on that was weird anyway. It was dark outside but Will was supposedly waiting on the cable guy?

      • mykleraus Says:

        It’s Salem. Of course the cable guy comes at night.

        Speaking of which, did the cable guy ever show up?! Lucky for Ben he didn’t interrupt a damn murder!

  8. Robbiemac420 Says:

    All the hubbub leading up to this glorious gala and all we get is a bunch of current cast members in horrible wigs (where were the men’s comment on the 60’s?), lousy outfits and standing around drinking (okay, a few danced). I thought we would see Philip, Chloe, Maxine, Belle, Sami, and all the rest who have been with the show for the past 50 years. This could have been simply a guest list for Hope’s wedding, which it was. Bo not getting back in time sucked. I predicted months ago that Ben was showing typical signs of a domestic violence perp, even before we knew he was the killer and he has now taken Abigail hostage. Instead of sending the police force out to find out where she is, Jen is more upset with JJ’s decision to join SPD. Ludicrous!

    • mykleraus Says:

      I think what they’re going for is to sprinkle the returns and visits through the “50th anniversary season,” but yeah, it’s a little absurd that the only people at this party are the same damn people we see every day. I wish they’d had a few people like Melissa, Marie, Laura, etc., show up just for these few days, even if they didn’t do much.

  9. Jayme Says:

    The hair reminded me of that joke Tina Fey told at the globes about American Hustle’s original title being ‘Explosion At The Wig Factory’. Dying, but I loved it. But i was really impressed at how good the hair was on the MEN. My god, can the boys at least try to keep this up?

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