The Worst-Laid Plans of Mice-Brained Men and Women

Sure is a banner week for people in (and out of!) Salem who have all sorts of plans and plots and schemes, huh? Let’s review…

First there’s Bree, who has apparently had a key to her deceased friend’s beach house for months and is so convinced that there’s evidence implicating said friend’s husband in her death somewhere in that house that she… waits until the husband and his new girlfriend are visiting to go over there and snoop around?

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That whole thing reeked of contrivance, but in general, I’m enjoying the Great Voyage to the Puget Sound. (By the way, I thought Bree knew them from Portland. Is this beach house “on the Puget Sound” — which is not in Oregon — somehow also near Portland? Or does Bree also have a beach house right by the one the Jennings had? And if so, does no one find that to be a sign that she might be a fucking lunatic stalker?!) The suspense of Hope becoming more and more convinced that something is afoot, coupled with Aiden constantly interrupting her, is fun and gothic and different for this show. I’m still not buying that the endgame here is that Aiden is a murderous nutjob — they’ve spent too much time investing in him, and all the evidence is incredibly circumstantial — but I like the vibe of it.

Should we start calling Meredith “Amazing Amy”? Because this is some Gone Girl shit right here.

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I’m intrigued. But if it doesn’t turn out that Meredith was a dangerous drunk and Aiden is covering for Chase, who accidentally killed her and blocked it out, then I’ll eat one of Will’s vests (which is fine because he’d still have 6,999 left).

On to Bad Plan #2: JJ and Rory use fake IDs to go to Victor’s still-unnamed club. Rory’s never been the sharpest tool in the shed, and JJ’s IQ seems to have plummeted since he got with Beige, but it’s still a little alarming to me that they would use fakes at a club where the owner, the manager, and God only knows how many patrons would recognize them. And what did they need the fake IDs for? Buying drinks? Because Paige, Daphne, and Cole were just chilling there without any apparent IDs later on — though, to be fair, if I were a bouncer, I’d never think to check Cole’s ID because I would be certain that he was old enough to have voted for Clinton both times.

Oh, and then we have Paige, who was allegedly smart enough to be admitted to Stanford but plans to move into the Salem U dorms with no apparent way to pay for room and board. How’s that gonna go with the university? “Oh, just add it to my tuition bill, which is paid by my mom, who does not want me to move out and has done much crazier things than refuse to pay a bill.” Brilliant work!

Which brings us to Eve.

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Poor, washed-up, criminally insane Eve, who broke down in hysterics because her college-aged daughter wants to move into the dorm — which is apparently close enough that Eve can go from her apartment to the campus 130 times a day to harass said daughter about her love life. You’d think she would be elated that Paige wasn’t planning to live at home forever, like Brady’s 40-year-old ass still shacking up with his grandpa, but such logic would require Eve to be even the slightest bit stable, which she is not. I almost forgot that, in keeping with the theme of this post, I’m supposed to be ragging on a plan of hers, which was to react to her fear of losing Paige by summoning JJ to her apartment to scream at him some more, but it’s so beyond stupid that I think it speaks for itself.

That “grief sex” — grief over losing Paige?! Throw a damn parade, you idiots — was absolutely ridiculous. I kinda-sorta get it from JJ’s perspective, because he actually thinks their relationship is ruined (which it should be, after this) and also because he’s a 19-year-old boy, but Eve is so bereft over the fact that her grown-ass daughter is moving ten minutes away — never mind the fact that Eve already sent her to live in a different damn city with an invisible cousin for months — that the only thing she can do is fuck said daughter’s ex-boyfriend? Someone get this woman a mood stabilizer and an appointment with Marlena, please.

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12 Comments on “The Worst-Laid Plans of Mice-Brained Men and Women”

  1. William Says:

    You might have missed it but Victor did name is built in one day club. He called it Edge of the Square early last week I believe he said it. Just another terrible name.

  2. Dylan Says:

    Certainly a week of mice-brained plans.. Gotta love that scene at the end today in which Serena was so flustered that she rushed into Eric’s apartment, left the door open, and tripped over the RUG!! And then of course Nicole was there. lol

    Eve is a nutjob, she needs to leave town. Nothing about her is working right now, although the actress is good.

    Yes, now it is clear that they have no idea where “Puget Sound” is.. Bree did say she lived in Portland. Unless of course we can conclude that Bree also has a beach house right next to the Jenning’s.. But she said that she “lives just down the road”, so that’s strange.. Love this storyline though, so suspenseful!

    • mykleraus Says:

      Eve needs to be institutionalized!

      The whole Portland/Puget Sound thing is so jumbled. I literally don’t even know what state they think they’re in (typical Days, to be fair).

      • Dylan Says:

        Haha. She’s not THAT crazy. I just don’t want her on my screen anymore. Also did you see the way Paige was crying today? The most fake cry I have ever seen. Anyway as far as I am concerned they can both move off to Stanford together

      • mykleraus Says:

        Everything Paige does feels fake!

        Also, she should be fired for bawling to the Chief of Staff about her boyfriend woes.

  3. otherweb1 Says:

    OK. The whole Eve/JJ thing needs to stop. It is SUCH bad writing … what, did Days run another one of their contests? Except this time, it was for high school creative writing students to get the chance to write some storyline for a while? Since Blake Berris left, I now count Casey Moss as the best actor on the show (in close running with Freddy Smith). Casey must be SO embarrassed to have to play this totally ridiculous trifecta with Eve bullshit. It’s just so stupid! Sure, Days does a lot of stupid stuff that at least still manages to be entertaining. But this trifecta thing is just beyond stupid with zero entertainment. In all it’s ridiculousness, Days has never made me angry .. but this makes me angry. Not because JJ and Eve do it again and in the most ridiculous way, but because someone actually was allowed to write this shit.

    • mykleraus Says:

      It’s so badly written. I see what they’re going for, but the seams are showing terribly. I really hope the writer change means that they’ll dump this entire angle. Eve can stay if they find a use for her with the adults. Paige gotta go. And they need to move JJ on to another story entirely.

  4. otherweb1 Says:

    Oh, and don’t get me started on the whole Edge of the Square thing. It was SOOOOO ridiculous on opening night when Theresa was the ONLY ONE screaming over the music to be heard like you would in a real club. Is there a reason why the director didn’t say either “Uh, Jen, could you please talk with a normal voice … we understand you are trying to lend authenticity, but no one else is doing it, so please stop so you don’t stand out.” Or else, “Uh, Arianna, Galen, everyone, please raise your voices like you are trying to be heard over the club music.” And HOW in the world do Rory and JJ go in with IDs, and then like TEN MINUTES later, Paige, Cole, and Daphne just go sauntering in??????? Never mind that a FORMER COP, WHO KNOWS THEM ALL, runs the joint.

    • mykleraus Says:

      I actually appreciated Jen Lilley bothering to add that to the scenes, but yeah, it was weird that she was the only one who seemed to be aware there was music playing.

      The fake ID thing and all the college kids being there was so weird. I feel like they’re going to be scrambling for reasons to use that set and we’re going to get a lot of people randomly going to the nightclub…

  5. Dan Says:

    Funny, I thought this was the first time Eve / J.J. hooking up made any sense. I bought that J.J. was devastated over losing Paige. I’m not, but I can see J.J. is torn about this. I even bought what drew Eve to J.J. After losing her voice, Eve was forced to turn all her attention on Paige. At first, I hated this because I felt like Eve needed to be better integrated, but this was clearly a purposeful move. Eve turned to J.J. because her world is so limited. I can see why she did what she did this time.

    With that said, I’m surprised they are bringing up the jacket. I figured they were going to drop that element, but, like those stupid baby clothes, I guess this will used to reveal the truth about Eve and J.J.

    Frighteningly enough, I’m almost at the point where I might root for Eve and J.J. if it means losing Paige.

    The Puget Sound / Portland / Salem thing is too much. So Bree Tjaden lived in Salem, moved to Portland to meet Meredith Jennings, and then also vacationed in the Puget Sound? I think if they had actually developed this out it could have worked. I would have made it clear that Meredith and Bree were part of the same social circle and that they had vacationed together, but prior to all this playing out.

    On the otherhand, they have been consistent with Aiden. The drinking problems have been hinted at since at least March when they had the Pizza Party from Hell. I just wish they were more ambigious with the writing for Aiden.

    • mykleraus Says:

      I guess what I don’t really get is why this is now an affair between JJ and Eve. I don’t buy that they’re THAT attracted to one another. JJ is self-destructing, so I get his end of it, but Eve being that broken-down over Paige MOVING TO THE DORMS felt insane to me. If Paige had, like, disowned her entirely, then I might have bought it more, but it was basically, “Yeah, I’m tired of us fighting, so I’m moving to campus ten minutes away,” and then she popped back home to get her charger and wasn’t even that upset with Eve anyway!

      Aside from the logistics of Bree being everywhere, I’m loving the Hope/Aiden stuff. I still think this is all a misdirect and he’s not actually a killer or a nut — it feels very ambiguous (almost ridiculously so) to me, but it’s fun and suspenseful.

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