Merry Christmas, Bitch!

I have a fun new game to keep me busy during my Days-watching: Keeping track of what excuses Hope makes for Bo’s absence. Any time she comes onscreen, who knows what she’s gonna say? First Bo was off in California helping get Caroline treated. Then he was picking Ciara up for three days. Now he’s off to visit Shawn, Belle, and Claire. What’s next? I hope they just keep getting more and more ridiculous. Kristian Alfonso is literally spending about 50% of her screen time wandering around explaining why someone else isn’t there. I bet this is the acting role she’s always dreamed of.

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I just hope this doesn’t end in another “My husband didn’t text me back, so I’m bravely divorcing him” storyline. I can’t take another one.

That said, I do like how they’re currently using Hope. She’s an important part of the Salem tapestry even without being a lead in her own story. Her involvement in the Nick story and now in the Marlena/Brady/Kristen stuff is fun and fresh, and if she never does a “European” accent or smokes a cigarette again, I’ll be thrilled. I’m a little worried that she’s going to become isolated — remember that weird period in 2009 when Bo was having psychic visions of Hope sleeping with Roman, and then Camille Grammer’s friend from Real Housewives of Beverly Hills kidnapped Ciara, and it was this weird islanded storyline until Carly showed back up? — but so far, so good.

That said, nothing might make me as happy this holiday season as Kristen snarking, “Merry Christmas… bitch” as Hope walked away. It brought back some special memories of 2010. Plus, I just got to say the following to my boyfriend:

Two years ago, Hope was in prison because she took these sleeping pills that, unbeknowst to her, made her develop an evil alter ego at night, so she went around Salem beating men up and stealing their wallets, and then finally she tried to set her husband on fire. Anyway, she was in prison and she uncovered an organ-trafficking ring, and one of the other inmates wanted to keep her quiet, so she went into her cell and beat her up with a Santa hat full of oranges while screaming, “Merry Christmas, bitch!”

And he didn’t run screaming from my home! So I think this might work out.

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4 Comments on “Merry Christmas, Bitch!”

  1. Joanna Says:

    Sounds like a keeper. I have yet to find a fella who tolerates my Days-related nattering.


  2. Ha, that’s super sweet! My boyfriend drew the line when I called him Fancy Face. But guess who’s getting a giant hourglass (probably from Home Goods) for Christmas!!!


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