Archive for July 2012

What Happened In Salem: Week of July 23rd

July 30, 2012

Sami and Gabi were neck-and-neck for gold in the Salem Idiot Olympics last week:

Sami — having been born of a woman who thought it was a good idea to jump out of an airplane during a blizzard — concluded that EJ’s only option was to jump bail for real. Will logged into the Salem PD’s Open Source Database and handily disabled the ankle monitor. EJ and Sami fled to a DiMera warehouse, where Will brought Johnny and Sydney to say goodbye to their dad. Once Will cleared out with the kids, the police came busting in, since years without use had allowed Roman’s brain to store up just enough power to have Will followed. EJ and Sami hid up on the catwalk as the cops, followed by Lucas, searched the warehouse.

Read the rest to find out What Happened in Salem (spoiler: stuff got blown up!) last week.


Even Kate Wouldn’t Go There

July 28, 2012

Aside from the explosion, there was another major shocker on Friday’s show.

I thought Abigail looked fine — the side ponytail was kind of goofy, but Kate Mansi was pulling it off — and then all of a sudden, they cut to a wide shot and I saw… I saw… this.


Every Day Should Be a Days-aster

July 28, 2012

Well, that was a good party, wasn’t it?

Oh wait. It was an awesome party.

Seriously, this show hasn’t done something of this scale in, what, four years? The last thing like this that I can remember is the plane crash that killed Grandpa Shawn.


At Least Her Hair Is All One Color

July 28, 2012

It sure was nice of Kate to help Nicole get dressed for the fundraiser!

Seriously, look at all that crap. Is she trying to build up her neck strength so she can just hang the baby sling around it?

A Few Snickers and a Swoon

July 27, 2012

Thursday’s episode was the first one that really, truly felt like a new writing team had taken hold of the show. Those Victor/Maggie/Daniel/Nicole scenes were straight out of 2010 (in a good way), amiright?! I loved Victor and Daniel enumerating each other’s terrible taste in women, culminating with Victor barking, “Chloe was stupid–vapid–a bottomless pit of need!”

Speaking of incredible dialogue, did anyone else catch Roman use the term “lame-ass” in reference to EJ — as in, “Now you and Will are all rah-rah over his lame-ass story!” I had to rewind to be sure I’d heard it correctly. Well, that and I can never tell what the hell is coming out of that trash compactor he calls a mouth.

And while we’re on the subject of EJ…



NON-SUIT CLOTHES! I think I finally understood what “the vapors” are when he walked in tucking in that blue shirt and buttoning up his jeans. Jeans!

I know this character is all over the place, and it’s never clear how he and Sami are supposed to feel about one another — also, seriously, if I see one more #EJami or #Lumi or #Safe thing on my Twitter feed, my head is going to explode — but that is a hot, hot man. Can’t we all just appreciate that for a minute?

Also, why is Will’s new thing careening into rooms at top speed, limbs all akimbo, screaming for EJ? It’s happened like three times in the past week. Is he just running all over town shouting EJ’s name like a lunatic? The way he’s always asking anyone and everyone about EJ and where EJ is and how EJ is doing, he’s turning that man into his own personal CAMEO.

Wednesday with the Deverauxeseses

July 26, 2012

Jack: You know what I see when I look at [Cameron]?

Me: An NBC late-night talk show host?

I mean, come on! Look at that jaw.

Meanwhile, it was lovely to see Jack and Jennifer, but could the two of them and Abigail lay off about how perfect everything is and nothing will ever change and yada yada? Because you know whenever anyone in Salem starts crowing about how great things are, shit is about to go down. And you know who is always the recipient of said shit?

Especially when there is something called a Days-aster coming!

They Also Talked About Dead Mothers

July 24, 2012

So: Brady and Madison are getting married “tomorrow.” I guess his one-day-long rehab was very successful.

It was kind of glaring how that entire montage of romantic flashbacks consisted of clips of them milling around the Town Square, standing in a conference room, and fucking in that one hotel room. If that’s all you’ve got after almost a year, I think you might have failed on the “epic romance” front.

You know that old adage about how, on TV, a happy couple is a boring couple? What the hell is going to happen when/if these two get married? I’ve been falling asleep since their first date. Is a giant mallet going to start popping out of the TV and smashing me over the head now?