Archive for February 2012

Infertile Imaginations

February 29, 2012

Nicole sure gets pregnant a lot for someone who’s “barren,” doesn’t she?

Also, isn’t she (allegedly) infertile because she got shot in the uterus? I love this show.

Meanwhile, I haven’t seen drunken deposed mayor Abe Carver in such a hilarious state since the time he was a blind, impotent cuckold:


Not Sure If You Guys Caught This…

February 27, 2012

…but I think Sami might have had sex with EJ.

Seriously, are all these people in a competition to see who can say the words “had sex with EJ” the most times?

However, I did get a great laugh out of Marlena barking at Sami, “For once in your life, please stop talking!” Preach it, Doc.

What Happened in Salem: Week of Feb. 20th

February 26, 2012

While Will finally admitted what’s been weighing on him and faced the future, Sami took a stroll down memory lane with a favorite old tradition:

Rafe confronted Sami and essentially told her that their marriage was over. Sami hardly knew how to react, since she usually gets exposed and dumped in public. “Let me go throw on a wedding dress!” she begged, hoping to get into the proper spirit, but Rafe stormed over to the DiMera mansion, where EJ and Nicole were celebrating his mayoral win and the one-year anniversary of the day where he mooned over her idiot sister while begrudgingly reciting some vows to Nicole. Rafe punched EJ, Nicole threw her brand new ring at EJ and stormed out, and Sami went over to accuse Marlena of having told Rafe. It’s a wonder the secret lasted this long, given the way she keeps bellowing, “I had sex with EJ!” all over town.

Check out the rest of this week’s What Happened in Salem recap!

When A Kiss Is Not Just A Kiss

February 25, 2012

I am so happy that I’m not even going to rant about this:

Okay, scratch that. Beer pong in the middle of the damn mall?! Are you kidding me? Could they not have set this party in a hotel room or something? Half the town lives in them anyway!

Whew. Anyway, I can barely bother to be annoyed, because this happened:

I started watching Days of Our Lives when I was 14. Coming out was nothing but a far-off fantasy — something out of another person’s life, really. The show captured my mind like little else had to that point. For a kid who had very few friends but an enormous imagination, it was the ultimate escape, a window into a world full of literally limit-less possibility and excitement. Even back then, I knew it was ridiculous, yet I couldn’t help but be swept up in the grandness of it all. Salem was a place where love and romance — things that I knew in a distant way that I wanted to experience, even if I was struggling with the how and why — always won out in the end.

Will Horton was a toddler when I began watching. (Amazingly, he’s pretty close to his real age these days. He’s supposed to be 17 this year!) Yesterday and today, I watched him kiss a boy and ask his grandma, Marlena, if that means he’s gay. If the 14-year-old me knew that was coming down the pike, his head would have exploded. As much as I enjoyed watching couples like John & Marlena and Bo & Hope overcome incredible and hellish (literally!) obstacles, part of me always craved the validation of seeing people “like me” in the same situations. A lot has changed in the past fifteen years. I’m a grown-up. Coming out has come and gone, and life is good. But getting to see that experience replicated on a show that has been such a major force in my life… I can’t explain how much it has meant.


It’s Hard Out There For a Pimp-Turned-Spa-Owner

February 24, 2012

Farewell to a… well… a not-very-good human being who hasn’t had any real purpose in six months.

I was actually kind of surprised that Quinn got an actual exit (although I guess he could be on again — who the hell knows?), and while the mere mention of Taylor’s name sent me flying off the couch crying and yelling, I appreciated the effort to tie his departure to an actual relationship established during his first run. I really have no idea why he was brought back in the first place, since the bulk of his story potential revolved around him being Vivian’s son and Carly’s savior, and I cannot fathom why anyone thought the man who pimped out one of the show’s heroines needed to be brought back and “redeemed,” but… enh.

Don’t let the people kickboxing in the lobby hit you on the way out!

About Time Someone Mentioned That!

February 22, 2012

Marlena: I’ve faced my demons.
Sami: Literally.
Marlena: Cute.


It isn’t often that I side with Marlena, Queen of the Sanctimonious, but I absolutely relished her tearing into Sami. She is so right — Sami can’t keep using Marlena’s affair with John as an excuse for every shitty thing she does, twenty damn years later. Get therapy for it or STFU, Sami.

(To be clear, I don’t think this is a fault in the writing. It’s great that both characters have a justifiable point of view in this situation. Sami’s anger at Marlena makes perfect character sense. But the things Marlena said to her were long overdue, and it’s fitting for her to say it now, since she sees what kind of effect Sami’s actions are having upon Will.)


This Seems Healthy

February 22, 2012

Far be it from me to suggest EVER taking life advice from Days of Our Lives — lest we all wind up wearing cocktail dresses to work, socializing with former serial killers, and the like — but I feel an extra warning is necessary after yesterday’s episode.

“Oh, I know what would fix our marriage! Let’s go back to Switzerland!” Really, Carrie and Austin?

Now, I’m single, so maybe I don’t know what the hell I’m talking about, but I have a feeling that if the only way to sustain your marriage is to live continents away from all your family and friends (Seriously, did they live in a cottage in the mountains the whole time they were in Switzerland? Didn’t they make friends in those five years?), said marriage might not be that stable to begin with.