Women on the Verge

Posted December 8, 2016 by mykleraus
Categories: Days of Our Lives, Soap Opera, Television

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Oh, Nicole. I know the feeling.

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always wake up in tears of horror after Daniel appears in my dreams!

In other news, you know what sounds like one of the few upsides of deciding to spend the rest of your life hiding from the world in your mother’s attic?

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Not having to curl your hair and put on makeup and get dressed in cute clothes every day! What is wrong with these people?!

At least neither of these ladies is as twisted as Gabi, who despite having allegedly been a model in the fashion industry thinks this is “the season’s hottest purse” and has been saving up for it.

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Someone get this girl a Marshall’s gift card, stat!

If You Can’t Say Something Nice…

Posted December 7, 2016 by mykleraus
Categories: Days of Our Lives, Soap Opera, Television

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In the spirit of the holiday season, I’m going to say some nice things about recent Days viewing:

Judi Evans is going to kill it as Adrienne coping with breast cancer, and this twist adds some depth to what’s been a pretty lightweight triangle.

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Bonus points for actually using the Steve/Adrienne sibling relationship so much of late!

JJ referring to how Jack left their family, insisting it was for their own good, as a plea to get Abigail out of the damn attic was a smart use of history.

Deidre Hall is cracking me up as Hattie.

Rafe and Shawn actually seemed smart by roping Kate into their investigation of Stefano.

At long last, we got to see Ciara and Claire with Victor — very overdue.

They’re using this Hope-in-prison storyline as an opportunity to finally address the fact that it was Deimos, not Stefano, who really held Bo prisoner–

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Oh wait. What started out as a promising way to tie up a loose end — and address the fact that Deimos is not a good guy — quickly devolved into a bizarre setup of him protecting Hope (after being able to waltz into a room full of prisoners with no guard?!) and then being more or less absolved by Victor. What the hell is going on? Is he Daniel reincarnated?! Because that’s the only other time I’ve seen this show twist itself into such knots to make sure I was convinced someone was actually good-hearted when everything he did onscreen suggested otherwise.

Sorry. Lost focus there.

Umm… oh, Andre trying to help Abigail by shading the hell out of Gabi was pretty funny. If we have to have him around, let’s just have him be a rude bitch to everyone.

What Happened in Salem: Week of November 28th

Posted December 3, 2016 by mykleraus
Categories: Days of Our Lives, Soap Opera, Television

Salem celebrated Thanksgiving in some typically unconventional ways…

Hope began her prison sentence and encountered trouble from some of the other inmates, including T-Boz from 90s R&B group TLC, who apparently failed to take her own advice and did, in fact, go chasing waterfalls, with results so disastrous they led her to being incarcerated in Salem, USA. Hope was stunned to find an ally behind bars in none other than Hattie Adams, Marlena’s hard-living doppelgänger. Hattie offered to protect Hope if Hope would promise to set her up with Roman when she gets out of prison, which is sort of like offering to bake someone an apple pie in exchange for a bag of dog poop, but hey — to each her own.

Read the full recap to catch up on What Happened in Salem this week!

Locked Up

Posted December 1, 2016 by mykleraus
Categories: Days of Our Lives, Soap Opera, Television

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Things I never thought I’d see: Deidre Hall playing a blue-collar version of Marlena going toe-to-toe with T-Boz from R&B group TLC.

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But here we are.

Frankly, adding a Marlena doppelgänger and the lead singer of “Waterfalls” is precisely what they need to keep me awake during this Hope-in-prison saga. Yes, her being intimidated and harassed by other prisoners is cliché, but she’s also a wealthy white woman who happens to be a cop who committed a notorious murder, so they do have to touch on that angle. It would help if we hadn’t literally seen this story six years ago, except instead of T-Boz, it was Janet from All My Children braining Hope with a sack of oranges while shouting, “Merry Christmas, bitch!” But we did, and Hope desperately needed to pay for killing Stefano in some way, so we’ve gotta get through this. The chance to see Deidre Hall in Hattie mode really contributes something fresh and fun, because she always digs in and relishes the chance to play these “alternate Marlenas.” Hattie Adams isn’t even a character so much as a concept; first she was a dowdy, loopy waitress played by Hall’s twin sister, and then she was a rude version of Marlena if she’d been styled by Whitesnake’s glam squad, and now she’s randomly in prison. I do enjoy the throughline of her wanting to be with Roman — remember that society woman, Giselle van Hopper, who desperately wanted Hope and Aiden to set her up with Roman, too?! Maybe this is why he spends so much time in the background. He can’t get any play from the main cast, but minor characters love the guy!

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Meanwhile, poor Adrienne has two men clamoring to be with her, and she’s so torn up about it that she took a nap for several hours (overnight?) while they waited. I keep trying to untangle the timeline of this whole thing, but it’s lunacy any way you slice it. From what I gather, this is supposed to be the morning after Thanksgiving? So Adrienne scheduled her wedding on Thanksgiving day?! Which was also the same day as Hope’s sentencing, since as we all know, courts love to be open on federal holidays. The other possibility is that she’s waking up later on Thanksgiving day (after everyone’s had dinner), so they’ve been there for like 24 hours just hanging out because Adrienne and Lucas had to have their damn wedding the day before Thanksgiving, a.k.a. one of the absolute worst days of the year to travel. No wonder none of your relatives showed up, ya jerks!

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And I know a lot of people are annoyed by Jade’s very existence, and I’m no huge fan of yet another teen pregnancy storyline, but I was incredibly amused by her on Thanksgiving. When she first showed up, she seemed batshit crazy, and they’re leaning into that now. “I’m thankful for the life growing inside me!” “Of course I’d help do dishes, but I’m so exhausted these days!” I’m pretty sure these are actual reused scenes from when Sami was a teenager, and I’m totally into it. If I have to sit through Joey moping over having to step up and be a father to Jade’s kid, at least let me laugh at her insanity and at Steve and Kayla’s reactions. It’s the little things, right?

Don’t Go Chasing Waterfalls

Posted November 29, 2016 by mykleraus
Categories: Days of Our Lives, Soap Opera, Television

Tags: ,

Truly strange, yet amusing, casting news that pertains to the very near future behind the cut…

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Like Sands Through the Looking Glass

Posted November 29, 2016 by mykleraus
Categories: Days of Our Lives, Soap Opera, Television

My trip back from Thanksgiving was supposed to be a two-hour drive, which turned out to be a four-hour drive, because Los Angeles + holiday weekend = hell on earth. What better use of that time, I thought, than to space out and think about Days? (Okay, there were a lot of better uses, but this is my life and these are my choices.) I don’t even know how I got down this particular rabbit hole, but I started thinking about how the show has cycled through so many different “eras” since I’ve been watching, and I wondered what I’d have thought if you’d, say, shown me an episode from the present day at some point in the past.

Which is basically what this post is. Let’s say it’s 2006 and someone, somehow, has gotten his or her hands on an episode from 2016. What the hell would you be thinking as you watched?

Episode # 10325

As a refresher, here’s some of the big stuff that was going down in 2006:

  • James Scott debuted as suave racecar driver EJ Wells, who would later be revealed to be a DiMera.
  • After being dumped at the altar by Lucas, Sami got back together with Austin, who was carrying on an emotional affair with Carrie, who married Lucas even though she didn’t love him because Sami got Lexie to lie that any child Carrie and Austin conceived would be genetically doomed.
  • Dr. Alex North, the first husband Marlena had somehow completely forgotten about (and no one like her parents ever told her about), showed up and tried to manipulate her away from John.
  • Jennifer almost married Frankie, but Jack turned up alive again, and his fatal illness was cured.
  • Kayla returned to Salem conveniently mere weeks before Steve turned up alive, with amnesia.
  • Bo and Hope were torn apart after Chelsea accidentally hit Zack with her car, killing him. Hope turned to Patrick Lockhart, while Billie saw yet another opening to throw herself at Bo.
  • Nick Fallon first appeared as a super-nerd instantly in love with Chelsea.
  • Belle was married to Philip but lusting after Shawn, who was revealed to be Claire’s true father because they had sex while they were unconscious and didn’t remember, which is pretty much the blueprint for their entire relationship.

Let’s take a glance at that crystal ball, or inside one of Celeste’s wigs, and see how 2016 might look through this lens…

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What Happened in Salem: Week of November 21st

Posted November 27, 2016 by mykleraus
Categories: Days of Our Lives, Soap Opera, Television

There were only three episodes, on account of the holiday, but everyone worked overtime to keep the stupidity up to its usual standard…

Jennifer and Andre both encouraged Abigail to reveal herself to Chad so that she could reclaim her family, rather than continuing to hide herself by walking around in public places in broad daylight wearing a Halloween witch costume. Abigail was resistant because she was sure that Chad had moved on with Gabi. Meanwhile, Chad and Gabi separately resolved to end their working relationship on account of their confusing new feelings for one another, which is why all of you should remember not to get locked in hot panic rooms and crawl spaces with your friends unless you’re ready to deal with the consequences.

Read the full recap to catch up on What Happened in Salem this week!